Loving You Was Supposed To Be Easy
by ClaireBear1982
Summary: Non-Romantic Jily. Angsty af. Lily comes out to her family, only to find herself kicked out. Thank Merlin for her best friend, James Potter, coming to her rescue. He's there for her as her world falls apart, in more ways than one. One swear word towards the end.


A/N: QLFC. Captain of the Wimbourne Wasps. Captain's Prompt: Non-Romantic James and Lily.

* * *

Lily's eyes flew open as she sat bolt upright. Her heart was pounding in her chest and her eyes stung with tears. She gathered her quilt to her chest and allowed her head to drop forward; tears were now running thick and fast from her eyes as she buried her face in the warm covers. She was still in shock at what had occurred in the last twenty-four hours; one minute, she'd happily been doing homework at her desk, then, not two hours later, she had been chucked out of her family home for good. Her chest heaved with sobs. Why had this happened? Why did life have to be so unfair?

"Lily, are you okay?" came a voice from within the darkness of the room.

But Lily couldn't answer; her throat was too clogged with emotion to be able to utter a coherent sentence. She felt the bed dip; a warm arm slid around her shoulder and waist. Then she was being pulled close to the body of the speaker. A warm hand rubbed gentle circles on her back, whilst words of comfort were whispered into her ear. Finally, Lily's sobbing subsided into hiccups.

"I'm sorry, James, I didn't mean to wake you," said Lily.

"Hey, it's okay. I wasn't asleep yet anyway," said James, chuckling.

Lily sighed and pulled away from her best friend in the entire world. Merlin only knew what she would have done if it hadn't been for the boy beside her. She thanked Zeus that Mr and Mrs Potter had agreed to take her in; otherwise, she would have been in real trouble—she could have gone to Ezra's, but that would have made things difficult for Ezra, who was already in enough trouble as it was. She didn't need Lily descending on her family's home and making things worse. Lily was part of the reason Ezra was in trouble in the first place, so she doubted she'd have been welcomed.

"Hey, what are you thinking about?" asked James quietly, nudging her arm, drawing Lily out of her morose thoughts.

Lily sighed again and scrubbed her face in her hands before speaking.

"I was thinking about Ezra and the fact that she's in trouble too. It's all my fault," said Lily, her voice cracking with emotion.

"Why is it your fault?" asked James.

"Because I essentially pushed her to tell her family about us," Lily whispered. "I just wanted everything to be out in the open so we wouldn't have to hide anymore."

James snorted with derision. "If anyone is to blame, it's your parents. They're _supposed_ to be your parents; they're supposed to love you unconditionally."

"Supposed to," whispered Lily.

James glanced at his best friend. All he could see was her dark red hair covering her face, but he knew Lily; he knew that behind that sheet of long hair, she was biting her bottom lip and willing the tears that had pooled in her eyes not to fall. He knew she would try to be strong as her world crumbled around her, but he also knew that she needed to let all these emotions go, because if she didn't, she would only fall apart faster. At least, he didn't have to worry about her hurting herself; Lily was far too strong-minded to do something as silly as that.

"Lily, if you need to let it go, let it go. It's no good bottling these emotions up," said James.

"I'm so tired of crying though. My body, my mind, and my soul are exhausted," said Lily.

"I know you are tired, but it's best to just let it all out. Then start rebuilding your life. Y'know, you've got me behind you, as well as Mum and Dad, right? I can't even begin to tell you just how angry they both are about this entire situation. I've never seen them this disgusted before," stated James. "Oh, not about you, before you start thinking that. I mean, with the way your family have treated you."

"Thank you, James. I don't know what I would have done without you," said Lily, her voice ending on a sob.

"You bloody daft Hippogriff, of course we were going to be there for you! We've been friends for seven years, and best friends for two of those; did you really think I'd just abandon you when you needed me the most? Honestly, woman," James chuckled.

Lily launched herself at James and wrapped him in a massive hug.

The next morning, Lily awoke to a tapping coming from the window. She quickly darted from the bed to the window, and threw it open, allowing the owl that was flapping outside to enter. It was her owl, Azalea, and she had a message attached to her leg.

 _Lily, my parents are threatening to homeschool me, what do I do? They say the only way I can go back to Hogwarts is if 'I stop all of this nonsense immediately.' I'm so scared, Lily, and I don't know what to do. I wish my parents would just kick me out too, but no such luck. Instead, I'm pretty much under house arrest (I had to get Bertie to sneak this out for me as it is). I love you and I miss you so much! I just want to see you! I would ask you to write back, but if my parents find out I've written to you, they'll definitely stop me from returning to Hogwarts! Merlin, Lily, everything is such a mess._

 _All my love always,_  
 _Ezra xx_

Guilt and frustration tore through Lily's veins. Why did she have to spoil things? Why couldn't she be content with the way things were before? Why did she feel the need to proclaim to the world that she was in love? Things had been good before, and at least she could still see Ezra, even if they had to sneak around behind both of their parents' backs. Hot molten tears poured down Lily's face. She started chucking things at the walls, screaming and shouting just to give vent to her frustrations, causing both James and Mrs Potter to come storming into the room.

"Lily? Lily, what is it, love?" asked Mrs Potter as she grabbed the girl by both wrists before pulling the sobbing Lily to her chest. James spotted the letter on the floor under the window and read it aloud. Once he was done, both James and Mrs Potter stared at each other for a moment before James spoke.

"Mum, surely, there must be something you or Dad can do?"

"I don't know, James. It's not really our place to get involved in this. We all know what the David family can be like only too well," said Mrs Potter, grimacing.

"Oh, I know alright!" said James crossly. He didn't care to dwell on that memory right at this minute; right now, his main concern was his best friend, who was still being cradled in his mother's arms.

"I'm sorry," said Lily eventually as she pulled away from Mrs Potter. "I just got so frustrated. I didn't mean to destroy your things."

"Lily, pay it no mind, what are a few knick-knacks? They can either be repaired or thrown out. Right now, I'm more concerned about you," said Mrs Potter soothingly.

"I just want to see her. I need to see her. I need to know that she's okay," said Lily, biting her lip.

Lily glanced at James. He had what Lily referred to as his 'concentrating face' on. She could almost hear the wheels in his head turning.

"James? What are you planning?" asked Lily wearily.

"Does Ezra's family know you're here?" asked James, an idea glinting in his hazel eyes.

"I don't know. I don't think so, why?" replied Lily.

"Because I think a make-believe get together is in order, don't you?" said James, winking at Lily and his mother.

Mrs Potter gave a mock sigh, and her lips twitched as she repressed a smile. That boy of hers was a mischievous little gnome when he wanted to be. For the sake of love, she would go along with it, she thought. That is, until James revealed the rest of his plan.

"Mum, can you write to the Davids and ask them if it's okay for Ezra to join us? Just don't mention about Lily being here," pleaded James as he gave her the puppy-dog eyes. "Please?"

"I don't know, James," said Mrs Potter. "I'm not exactly popular with the Davids myself—they're still sore because I didn't marry Mr David's cousin all those years ago."

"Please, Mum? If that fails, I'll think of something else," said James.

"James, please, I don't want your mum to go to any trouble. I'll just see how the land lies by the time school starts again," said Lily tiredly. "Honestly, it's fine."

"Lily, you want to see Ezra, right?" asked James softly.

"Of course I do! But I also don't want to cause any problems for any of you. I think I've done enough of that as it is," said Lily.

"Pssht, it's no problem," said James, flapping his hand at her. With that, he ran from the room.

"I'm so sorry about all of this," said Lily to Mrs Potter as she indicated to all the broken fragments that were strewn across the floor.

"Don't worry about it, dear. I'm sorry that your parents have done this to you," replied Mrs Potter.

"I can try and mend some of these bits if you like?" said Lily, who was trying her hardest not to let Mrs Potter's kindness towards her be her undoing yet again.

"If it'll make you happy, dear, then please do. If there's anything you need, anything at all, I'll be downstairs in the den," said Mrs Potter as she squeezed Lily's arm before heading downstairs.

Lily stared around the room at the mess she'd made, and sighed. She retrieved her wand from the bedside table and started to repair everything she possibly could—though, because of her inner torment, she was finding it hard to concentrate and it took her double the time it normally would have.

Later that afternoon, James came charging into Lily's room, waving a piece of paper above his head, grinning in triumph.

"You're seeing Ezra next weekend!" he exclaimed wildly.

"What? How?" Lily in asked startled fashion as she put down the book she'd been reading.

"I wrote to her parents this morning, and explained that we're having a party for Mum's birthday, and as Ezra is a good friend of mine, I asked if it would it be okay if she came along as I was allowed to invite a few friends to join in. I told them I was inviting Sirius, Marlene and Frank too," said James. "Oh, I invited Remus, Alice, Peter and Mary too."

Lily noted that the friends he'd mentioned in the letter were all from Pureblood families, but didn't remark upon it. Still, she smiled happily at the mention of Remus, Alice, Peter and Mary especially.

"I'm very surprised they're allowing her to come over, in all honesty," said Lily. "I thought she was supposed to be virtually under house arrest."

"Ah, but you see, at any Pureblood gathering," said James, using air quotes, "it's the done thing to have someone from that family as a representative present, especially when a specific person has been requested to be in attendance."

"Oh, I see," said Lily, and she truly did. She'd read enough about how the Upper-Class British families would do the same in the Victorian era in hopes of matching their offspring to the perfect suitor. "I just hope they don't find out that this gathering isn't really happening."

"Well, that's just the thing; it is happening. Dad organised it a while ago, with it being Mum's sixtieth birthday and all—not that she knows that. I'd already invited Sirius, Frank and Marlene a little while ago, but inviting Ezra was no hardship, Lily," said James, giving her a small pat on the hand.

"It's probably best if I don't put in an appearance. I wouldn't want to cause any more problems for Ezra," said Lily, sighing.

"No, you have to come too, Lily. It'll be so packed and no one can keep track of everyone. Take last year, for instance! Nobody even noticed Sirius and Marlene making out in the shadows," laughed James.

This piece of information caused Lily to roll her eyes. It was so typical of Sirius and Marlene and their on-off relationship.

"So, what time is Ezra arriving?" asked Lily, chewing her lip.

"Seven, so be ready," said James, smiling at his best friend.

"Thank you, James," said Lily before getting off the bed and throwing her arms around him.

The next weekend dawned bright and clear. Lily was waiting in nervous, excited anticipation for her girlfriend's arrival. She'd made an important decision overnight, and she was nervous about discussing it.

Finally, seven o'clock arrived. Lily had been pacing up and down her room nervously for hours. So much so that James had joked that she was wearing a tread into the carpet. Lily had just stopped and glared at him for a moment before sighing and sitting on the bed. At last, the door swung open, and there she was, in all her beautiful glory.

"Lily?" Ezra gasped in astonishment as James winked at Lily and strode away.

"Ezra! It's so good to finally see you! I've missed you so much!" said Lily as she launched herself into her girlfriend's arms.

"Sweet Merlin, are you real?" asked Ezra happily as she drew the girl back to look at her in more detail.

"Yes, yes, I'm real, sweetheart," replied Lily as she snuggled closer to Ezra and breathed in her sweet scent.

"I can't believe it! I never thought in a million years that I would see you here of all places—though, I should have guessed really," said Ezra nervously.

Lily picked up on this nervousness and caused her to pull away so she could look at her full in the face.

"What is it? What's wrong?" asked Lily in concern.

"Oh, it's nothing, come here," said Ezra cheerfully and pulled Lily close to herself again.

But it _was_ something. For most of the party, Ezra completely ignored Lily and spent the evening circulating among the other guests. Lily wondered if this was something to do with her being worried about being spotted talking to her. No one had even noticed James, Sirius, Remus, Peter, Frank, Alice, Marlene, and Mary so far. In fact, Lily felt they were almost completely invisible, so, by now, Lily was biting her lip.

"Everything okay, Lily?" asked Remus as he moved to stand with the girl, who was looking a little forlorn and lost right at that moment.

"Hey, Remus," said Lily, glancing at the boy beside her. He looked a little thinner than the last time she'd seen him, and remembered that it had been a full moon a little over two weeks ago. "How did things go at home?"

"I'm surprised James didn't tell you, but my family kicked me out of the house!" said Lily in derision, her eyes scanning the room again.

"Merlin, I am so sorry, Lily," said Remus.

"Thanks, Remus," said Lily, focusing her attention back on the boy beside her.

"What about Ezra? Wasn't she planning on telling her parents too?" asked Remus.

"Yes, and she did. Apparently, she's virtually under house arrest, but has been given permission to be here for the sake of appearances," supplied Lily.

"Oh, so what are the two of you going to do now?" asked Remus.

"I have no idea. When she got here, she just wanted to cuddle me and she refused to talk to me properly," said Lily in exasperation. "And now, she's just plain ignoring me."

Remus gave her a pat on the shoulder and moved away. He could sense she was getting angry, and angry Lily was never pretty.

Finally, Lily was able to corner Ezra in the pantry of the kitchen.

"Ezra, what is going on? Why have you ignored me all evening?" asked Lily forthrightly.

"What do you-"

"You know exactly what I mean, Ezra, so don't give me the 'what do you mean' bull," said Lily, her green eyes flashing in warning.

Ezra swallowed hard. "Lily, I can't do this."

"What do you mean, you can't do this?"

"I can't afford to lose my family like this. They are all I have. I know they're strict, but it's only because they love me," said Ezra quietly.

"Do you really think I could afford to lose my family? They were all I had in the world too, y'know! So, what are you saying? We're over? I put everything I had on the line for you, and this is how you repay me?" snapped Lily bitterly.

"I'm sorry, Lily, I truly am-"

"Do you know what? Save it! I don't want to hear it! And to think, I was going to ask you if you wanted to get a place together once we'd finished school! I was going to use the money my Gran gave me in her will to get us a place!" said Lily, ending on a sob.

Ezra reached out to hold Lily, but Lily batted her arms away.

"Fuck you, Ezra, take a dive off the Astronomy Tower!" Lily sobbed as she swept away.

As Lily made her way towards the stairs to head back to her room, she was cut off by James.

"Oh, Merlin, what's wrong?" asked James in concern.

"Ezra had called us off; I've lost everything for nothing."

James took the girl he considered to be his best friend in the entire world in his arms and held her tight.


End file.
